What's Making My Ears Bleed Today

So the lady in the office next to mine, which is separated by a wall that doesn't go all the way to the ceiling, plays music everyday. And why not? Resigned to cubicle life as a lowly fact-checker for a hypersensitive division of Time Warner, who wouldn''t need a little aural stimulation to help ease the pain of a grueling workday spent accomplishing inane tasks like finding government sources to back up the fact that bananas are healthy. "Hello, FDA? Um, yeah, I'm fact checking a story for a magazine called "Nutrients and You!" I was wondering if there were any documents available from the FDA that explicitely state the nutritional content of a banana. Yes, well, I know everyone knows they're healthy, but I need a GOVERNMENT DOCUMENT that says so, or my boss will freak out..."

ANYWAY, I wouldn't really care about this lady's music, except for the fact that her musical tastes seemingly stopped evolving in 1991. Most days I'm treated to repeat loops of "Fumbling Toward Ecstacy" or, if I'm lucky, an endless mix of Indigo Girls live performances.

But today, today, she's really gone too far.

"Don't Worry, Be Happy," by Bobby McFerrin.

That's right. Somewhere the world, someone turned on their iTunes and thought, "What do I want to listen to?" and the answer was "Don't Worry Be Happy."